Help
Sign In
changes
November 2009 
learning to let go.
Posted on Aug 27th, 2008
by 
Siona
Siona
I posted this to our Ambassador's Group earlier today, but it seemed something I should say here, too.
Yesterday was one of the more difficult days I've had here so far.
Our company is going through a bit of a structural reshuffle and part of this corporate shudder involved a significant number of layoffs. This particular division (meaning our Gaia Community team) lost far, far fewer people than some areas, but it hasn't felt at all as though we're suffering any less. As of yesterday, Rommel and Jake are no longer working on Gaia, and dear Kelly is no longer with the accounting deparment.
I thought about sharing this yesterday, when it happened, but there was so much else going on, and I kept struggling about where to start… especially because it feels unfair to complain when so many of other areas of the business are trying to catch their breath as well and because we're all still trying readjust to our smaller size.
I was lucky enough to spend most of yesterday evening hanging out at Jake's last night and reminiscing, and that alone was so sweet. Our whole group has been such a family to me and we've been through so much together, and even though I know quite well that–given their skills and their hearts and their wisdom–there's brilliance ahead for each of them, it's still strange to think that we won't be working on the same project anymore.
And part of that is just me being selfish. There are others in the world (other businesses and people and jobs!) who need those three more, but I want them HERE.
Anyway. I know the remainder of our immediate crew (Chris and Ryan and Francois and Jessica and Matthew and Jodi and Dave, as well as the many others who work to support this company) will keep filling the community with all the heart and love we can muster, and I know that those who come join the site will continue to do the same, and I know that we'll keep focusing on our next steps and our streamlined rehaul and continuing to grow the most amazing space online, and I know that all this will continue to unfold as it will and must and has. I trust in the future; there is always that.
Still. Ow. I wish someone could fix our economy. Barring that, lots and lots of of love and positive thoughts and hugs to everyone who was affected by this (including those who had to make the hard decisions) would be wonderful. Goodness knows I could use a hug.
.
Access: Public
ooouch!! downsizing really hurts –the ones who go and the ones who stay. The Pain will be temporary tho it might not feel like it now, today. But they will all move on to new adventures perhaps ones even they couldn't have imagined. I wish everyone well as they adjust to the new reality.
(((hugs)) all around
Hugs & :'(
(((((((Siona))))))) it's really tough being the leader when these kinds of decisions have to be made. There will be lots of hugging for all of you from all over Gaia…
Hugs for you, Siona, and to Rommel, Jake, and Kelly. I'm hoping those who must move on will find themselves falling upon something else that is exciting, and opens their lives up in new ways.
hugs to all and thank you Siona for letting us know.
a huge, soppy hug for you, siona.
ouch and ouches, no fun. and to lose kelly of all people, why, she seems like heart and soul of the place. wil she no longer be paid staff? :(
even though right now in my work world, we are expanding (albeit form hand-me-overs and such) i have been there. my one job in the corporate world was hr director and little did i know until the time arrived, i was to lay-off a mess of people, then got promptly laid off myself. so being on both sides of the fence helps me to really get it~and to feel for you all.
perhaps some of your greatest strengths are being called for, Siona, for your gaia work family, gaia and you!
my unsolicitd advice: center, breathe, and get outside! remember to laugh…know you are not alone!
much love,
mary
mimi: Oh, I completely agree. I feel as though we're all undergoing a bit of shellshock. I know it'll be okay (if it weren't for layoffs we'd never have gotten Jake in the first place, and fate has a funny way of disguising gifts as disasters), but this week is still painful. Thank you so much for the hugs.
Ladybear: You've already been so dear. Thank you.
Nicole: Oh, sweet Nicole. I could feel that hug from here, really. Thank you thank you thank you, and I believe that parenthetical embrace you left could hold the whole community.
crow: Me too… and I have no doubt we'll be hearing about it here when they do.
Samme: You're welcome. I so wish instead I didn't need, but you're welcome.
Mary: Yikes. And thank you so much for that story. It makes me feel just a wee bit better about ours. (And yes, Kelly is no longer on the payroll. She'd been working in accounting but was so much a part, and so close to, the official community team, and yes… heart and soul and spirit and the rest. But I don't think she'll be leaving HERE anytime soon. Or I certainly hope not.)
I'm breathing. Promise. :)
That blows. Been there–twice. Your layoffs seem a lot lighter than what I've experienced, if that's any consolation!
Hoping that Kelly, C, and Jake bounce softly into equivalent or better opportunities….
All will be alright. Their love and wisdom will always be part of Gaia.
Love always,
Paul
This isn't the end of the road, and I hope Rommel, Jake & Kelly feel free to keep in touch with the Gaia community and talk about all the amazing things that happen in their life. In the end, wherever they ended up for career, wherever in life, they are awesome people, and did create the purpose of changing things for the better by being a part of the Gaia Team. I truly and honestly wish them all the best now and beyond. They've got an amazingly bright future ahead. Letting go isn't supposed to be easy when there is admiration. If we didn't feel for them it would be different. Thanks for all you do to keep this group thriving.
BIG HUGs!!! Sometimes words can do nothing as well as a big hug and just knowing we're here with you, the team, and with Rommel, Jake and Kelly, in spirit and in heart.
Hi Siona~
This news is certainly hard to swallow. Remember, you have lost some dear co-workers, but you didn't loose family. I've been fortunate to meet a lot of you and never have i seen a group of people who just loved what they do, who they work with and who they work for. The days ahead will be tough and challenging but I believe you will all remain close and find ways to grow from this.
Good luck to you all, and to all a big hug.
I am thinking of you , and if there is anything I can do , tell me , Gaia has given me so many gifts, and in return I will give you so much love , and so much more…
All my love Siona, I wish I was there so I could give you a warm hug, sweetie.
Loriann
I don't know which is worse, being laid off, or being the one still left. Both are hard to experience. I wish you peace and strength.
There is a place for them, the universe has a nice way of organizing things.
Just have to trust.
I am sending you a sister hug, for comfort, until the reasons are revealed.
Hugs, hugs, and more hugs. Even knowing that we're going to see some amazing revelations from this … it still hurts. Love to all.
I could think of a dozen flowery and consoling things to say, Siona, but here's a warm, loving, understanding hug instead.
Siona, I know this isn't any consolidation, it's a “roll ups,” when one organization buys another to create a larger more powerful company. …
When it happened to me they called it “right sizing”...now that just wrong on so many levels.
You will do just fine, and thanks for keeping us all safe and informed. I appreciate it.
hugs your way for all..
~lars
…wondering what sacrifices were made by uber-management…hmmmm…
Duff: I did actually think of you, and the Falling Fruit team, too, so yes, the perspective does help. It could have been much worse. And I'm sure they will.
Paul: Seeing your eye here makes me so happy. Yes, yes, and yes.
~KES: Oh, I have no doubt they will! And Jake might even have TIME to write now. (He's on vacation with his sweetie for a bit, which is why he's been silent.) And thank YOU for being a part of all this.
Crouching Tiger (and Ayla and Authentic Soul and Bluewater and Burt): You left an almost wordless gesture that offered as much as pages of writing. Thank you so much for the hugs, and here's another right back. You've no idea how much they help.
Don John: I know; I feel absurdly fortunate in that, and that I'll still get to “see” Jake and Rommel and Kelly just as I did before. Not every dissolution comes with that built in connection.
CocoCee: It sounds as though you've had some taste of this before. And yes, I agree. There's no easy side to be one.
FastDart: Keeping you informed, I think, is the very very very least I could do. (And because someone mentioned a worry about this earlier, I should say that neither Gaiam nor Gaia Community is going anywhere, and as long as the latter exists, I'll be around. The fact that we stayed when others, some of whom had been with the company for over a decade, had to leave, says something to me about our 'fit' here, and that there's support for it.)
Will: Well, without uber-management, we wouldn't be here, and it's hard being under shareholder pressure. And if you look at my response to FastDart, I think you'll see some evidence of their belief in our Gaia Community crew.
Again and again and again, love to you all. I'll post another update soon.
I am holding a sacred space for some very special, talented, giving, thoughtful, loving, creative, caring, awesome folks.
One day they will see this moment as a gift as they soar further into their brilliance.
Thanks to each crew person who is no longer working here, and each one who is….for causing my life to be filled with so many extraordinary, transformational beings…That includes YOU, angel Siona.
Thanks Siona for being so transparent about how this was for you. It doesn't change any of the difficult realities, but it does seem to bring some much needed heart and compassion into what is traditionally a “harsh business reality” I admire your vision and courage. Big HUG to you. Simon
Learning is an on going process, and from you I learn that I can have a positive outlook on the economy. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
((((((((((((((((((siona)))))))))))))))))))
Light hugs to all
Hugs, Siona.
There is a hole that aches. Whatever comes, something is lost that cannot be replaced.
It is ever so with life.
Deborah
Siona, my arms are always here to hug you my dear…and anyone else who needs one. Let me wrap you up tightly and hold you a spell…just release into me and I'll make the world go away just for a bit.
At times like these friends help us all cope and make it through those dark nights and days that arent so bright either. I know that Kelly, Rommel and Jake are eternally thankful for the friend that you are Siona..as am I. Hugs to you my friend, today, anyday…always. And one for Kelly, Rommel and Jake as well…or anyone else who needs one. Love you Siona!
I tried to reply sooner but have had computer challenges.
I echo all the comments and made my main comments a couple of other places for you.
As I said to Rommel: This is all in the Divine Plan, for sure, but I don't have to like it !!!!!! [in the short-term anyway.]
But it really does help to know there is a Higher Good operating – even in the fact of the downturned economy !!!!
Blessings, OM Bastet
Dear Siona,
I only read this today (sept.5th) otherwise I would have reacted sooner.
I am so sorry for what happened and understand it must be so sad and painful. Yes indeed a lesson in letting go.
At the same time , I feel. and it's been said by others already, all will be well for all of you. When one door closes, another one opens, even if we might not see this today, I know you must also know this to be true.
Thinking about synchronisity, the other day when I sent you that hug, I had not read this post yet but I must have 'picked up sòmething' because I sooo wanted to send you that hug!
Isnt that amazing…, isn't that the shere beauty of life..?
And through your and the teams work we are blessed to have Gaia, this wondrous place where Love is accellerated at amazing speed and touches and connects so many hearts.
Your beloved friends and collegues Rommel, Jake and Kelly will be missed in the team but they will be all right and find other stars to follow. And they will most likely stay connected to Gaia.
You and the rest of the team will find ways to work within the new structures.
Well my dear, it's time for another hug,
Be well,
Love,
Lucienne
I'm so sorry, Siona. Layoffs are never, never any fun.
But the end of one thing is always the beginning of another. Sending hugs your way…
DG
oh my the nest feels so empty…. may their wings be strong & held high!
I love my buddies & hope we hear their current news…..